Brrrrrrrthday

Yesterday our Roxi girl turned 2.  This is what the plan was: 

I left for foodland at 3:20pm the day of with both kids to get the ice cream. Bday girl's dad had been down and out with the flu the past 48 hours. Like seriously dead to to the world. the bigger they are the harder they fall. So solo I went! I instantly hit the ice cream isle and wanted to over do it all, but quickly cut myself off. I didn't want to even try and make it a to die for pretty pinterest party and disappoint myself. Ice cream, cones, whip cream, sprinkles and a cherry on top. 

Came home, threw a sheet on the folding table and this is the party we got. My two year old and all her friends couldn't have been more entertained. 

I wanted the day to be simple and enjoyable for everyone.  Birthday girl didn't wear anything special making her stand out in fact she was in closest thing acceptable to her birthday suit. The neighborhood kids were bringing her gifts all day from inside their houses and wrapping them in whatever they could find. It was awesome to see them give and make her feel special... she was stoked.  

Roxi's best friend is a little boy across the street she named "Badu".  When we were up in the morning out playing he was jumping up in down in the window of his apartment with his gift ready to give to Roxi, it was adorable. Then his door opened and he BOLTED out to give her a present, then ran back in and came back out with a little birthday cake.  What a way to start the day! We have amazing friends here.  

The party was messy, yummy and I even had fun.  A bunch of her friends played outside with whatever gifts she pulled out of their bags and ate a few melted ice cream cones. 

In my family growing up our tradition was that our gifts were hidden somewhere in the living room and we had to find them because well our birthday comes every year whether we earned it or not. What I plan on implementing in our family is that in order to get your gifts each kid has to give me something or service because HELLO! I BROUGHT YOU HERE! =) 

Anywho we love our Roxi Girl and all of her attiTWOed.  Happy Birthday! One good thing about each new day is it's one step closer to being THREE (my dad told me that). 

Yes these were the best pictures we got.  I am completely satisfied with how it all went down and so was miss Roxi.  That's an accomplishment. Thank you for everyone who helped make her day so special! We love you!

Next year:  popsicles

get that fix

Once I decide I want to do something, I want to do it NOW. example: when I want to cut my hair, I don't want to call and make an appointment, I want to walk in, sit down and do the dang thing, otherwise I end up doing it myself.  (not so good sometimes)  I realized that I HATE anticipation, that build up, the planning and preparation because then when it does or doesn't turn out as every hope and dream I had, it's somewhat disappointing. The two events so far in life that have ZERO let down after for myself have been the birth of my two babies.  9 months of build up and they can't let me down, it's impossible. I thrive in spontaneity and I never used to claim that.  This way there are no expectations.  this is all interesting now that I think about my day and routine and such... but the times I am most happy are impromptu moments that go a little like this,

"Hey what do you think about a sunset swim? OK go get dressed before I change my mind."

I don't believe in perfect moments although there is a time and place for everything. Wait I don't know if that applies to everything I thought anymore. Ehh anyways. I was the kid who never used my art set because I wanted it to be on a REALLY REALLY special project, the perfect project....and you know what, it never got used.  The food I bought went bad because I was waiting for the special occasion to prepare it instead of just eating it! That's what food is for!!! To eat when you want to eat it! Ugh why why why me!? I waited TOO MUCH for things to be just right and I CANT DO IT ANYMORE.

GO GO GO. Keep it movement. 

Been busy

When I was a youngin my older sister would tease me and say, "You're going to grow up, go to BYU Hawaii, marry a beautiful Polynesian man and give me beautiful brown nieces and nephews". Check check and CHECK! I have no idea what made her fabricate such hopes for me, and there were times I was no where near this path whatsoever. But look at me now. These past 3 years have been pretty productive to meeting my sisters expectations. 

3 years ago at this time I was balling my eyes out because I was scared to wake up the next morning and go back to the temple where I would be sealed for time and eternity to my partner in crime. I wasn't nervous about marrying him, (although I probably should have been) but more so I was nervous to go back to the temple after my first go prior that evening. My first session kinda rocked my world. Poor D thought I didn't want to marry him haha. But I made it back and we did it. 

3 years ago tomorrow we were told that the feeling we felt that day, that what we thought was "love", would go away. Romantic right? Love has to be learned and cultivated. Do work son. And it is work. Hard. But I never knew what that meant before in the thick of it, that marriage is hard. I don't even know how to explain it to someone not married... You just have to do it to feel it. And you'll feel it ALL. The emotions such a bond plays on is crazy. 

I married him because I wanted to. It was solely selfish reasoning. I want to be with him I want to build with him and I want to become great with him! 

So 3 years and two beautiful kids later here we are. I've been pregnant for about 1/2 our marriage... Haha life's  been busy and  time has been warped. Cheers for eternity! Love loving my husband. 

Let's do this

Today I did something I knew I would eventually do but wish I didn't. I read a story about this last month and it made me sick to my stomach! This is how babies die. 

Ok now you're dying to know what happened right?

And so it began, I'm a little scattered as I rushed out the door with baby, over night bag, and dinner disbursed evenly to keep balance as I scoot toddler out and down the stairs to the car. We're all in and on time with no tears, so far so good!  I'm on my way to my in laws house where I will be staying for 2 weeks and looking after our disabled cousin.

I pull up to the drive way, put the car in park, turn, look at the load I'm about to transfer into the house and make a split second game plan of what to pick up first. I turn off the car throw my keys in my bag in the drivers seat, open the door stand up, hit the unlock button so I can get the kids out and close the door. (I almost wanted to say the door fell shut to make myself feel better because it does that all the time, but it didn't, I closed it. I go to open back door...LOCKED

Both my babies are locked in my car in Hawaii in one of the hottest hours of the day with all the windows up. No spare key exists nor AAA. Thank goodness I was at the house and had access to a phone because mine is in the car of course. I call my husband. Straight up, no hello, just "DES I LOCKED THE KIDS IN THE CAR I NEED YOUR HELP." Click.

Yeah it feels like that ^^ (thanks kate for the clip haha!)

So what am I doing in the mean time?? Watching in horror as my almost 4 month old (who sweats like a beast as it is) screaming and making it worse! The toddler is still a little clueless and okay. Her cousins came out and are talking to her through the window. If I walked away she'd get mad and cry because she thought I was leaving her. Well we got her to try and unlock the door from her carseat but she her fingers weren't strong enough. Here I am yelling to her "I'll give you a pop if you open the door!!!" (Otter pops are my most powerful bargaining chip this week)  And of course the one time its ok for her to try and climb out her car seat, she wont even try. I now decide its a good time to start praying. One cousin (age 5) got his crow bar and offered to pry the door open and said he thought it would work. I declined the offer and said lets wait and see what Dez could come up with.

As I'm calling Des to see where he is and if I should call the fire department, after the first ring I see this big black SUV swing the corner (towing a trailer of picnic tables) and barrel straight toward us. They stop and jump out Dez, one of his boys and his boy's dad, all charge the car with some straight up theft tools and get down to business.

Apparently the conversation after I called des to tell him what happened was along the lines of
Des- "my wife locked the kids in the car!"
Uncle- "Get the F*** in the car! Lets do this!"(I'm glad they're on our team)

And this they did. After prying open the door with a wedge they stuck a bent rod through the crack and fished until they hit the unlock button. Mid operation a lot of faith in my husbands parenting was restored when I heard him say "forget the car! Break em if we haft to!" Because this car, our murdered out Chrysler 300 is one of his cherished children.

As soon as I heard that lock free we flew the doors open and grabbed the kids. Both were totally fine besides a little sweaty and confused.

I'd been paranoid about when this would happen. I probably increased my chances of it happening simply by the law of attraction. haha but our unlock button is not the most reliable and takes a few pushes before it actually does its job. I rushed and look where it got me. I'm so glad everything was okay. My babies are safe and the car not damaged, Dez didn't give me a rough time about it and I now have two spare keys for when this DOESN'T happen in the future.

Then we went inside and made sock puppets. The end

Tech Siesta

As follow up from my post about disconnecting, I hereby declare a daily tech siesta from 3pm-4pm. One hour unplugged. Yes I'm taking all the electronics (his, hers and minis) and locking them in our gun case for the hour.

According to wikipedia, "The original concept of a siesta seems to have been merely that of a midday break intended to allow people to spend time with their friends and family"

Let you know how it goes.

Thank you

What Not to Wear (baby edition)

I just want to start this out with thanking any and everyone who has ever given my kids clothes. We truly appreciate them and I hope this post doesn't imply otherwise. That being said, this post is about baby clothes and how much I hate them. And this is all my own OPINION in which you are entitled to agree or disagree (beauty of a blog right?)

Babies are humans and deserve to be dressed like a human(if we must dress them at all). It hurts me to see what these helpless beings are paraded around in. Here's my main issues

• Wording.  They're clothes don't need to explain their life. unnecessary and dumb. 
• Characters. leave them for the TV, my child is not a walking advertisement, rarely I find a cute animal or classic character I'm okay with
• Prints. Too abstract. Usually a hit or miss. I like the classic stripes, polkadots and just plain! 
• Bells and Whistles. Bows, Ruffles, Darts, Lace, Rhinestones, Pockets. Headbands. Enuff already!
• Expensive. Seriously why do baby clothes cost the same if not more than adult clothes, its 1/4 the material?? Scam

Pjs are the exception, there is some flexibility there.  Everyone young and old has some sort of ridiculous looking article of clothing that they have and sleep in, and that's your business) 

What I'm getting at is babies are cute in the bare minimal because that is their means of survival.  

I'm sure I'm not alone and it's pretty natural that I want my kids style to reflect my own...  I have to look at them all day gosh darnit. Haha jk. No but forreal though. When I do go shopping, is this this too much to ask? I want  

• Simplicity
• Affordability 
• Comfort
• Ease
• Functionality  

example: Jeggings I think were the best thing to happen to baby clothes in a LONG time.  And what makes a plain V neck onesie so darn hard to find other than at a high end expensive store online??

I'm pretty fortunate to live in a climate that does not require full clothing if any at all for a majority of the year, but I know other mothers and fathers feel my pain.


I hope this post does not ever deter or discourage anyone who is ever inclined to give us baby clothes because I am indeed so grateful for it all! I am also grateful to be able to protect and clothe my kids so please don't take this the wrong way.  And I'm not by any means judging you or your kids for what they wear. This is not meant to be snobbish. I'd love to hear others opinions on why they chose what they do for thier kids wear and if they care! I do find fashion an interesting lens to view life in general, hence the reasoning behind this post in the first place. 

I don't like to think of myself as very materialistic but if society is going to require us to clothe ourselves and children, I believe we should be able to at least make it enjoyable!

Now don't go scrutinize every pic I post of my kids to see what they're wearing!

Flashback Friday?

So originally I was going to tell flashback stories every once in a while here... but then as I started rehashing the interesting ones, I realized that maybe I don't want those to be public record for my kids to unearth once they figure out how to use google... which might be sooner than we think. SO in the interest of keeping my respect and parenting authority I will refrain from story telling until I think of an appropriate noteworthy flashback. By then I may forget it all anyways, which might not be a terrible thing in some cases.  

...this might be a while.

Yaddida smell me

Never knew how much I used my nose until last week when almost everyone including myself caught this cold. Here are a few observations:

Checking diapers requires way more effort with a broken sniffer! 

Laundry doubles because I can't tell what's clean or not, so into the basket it goes! 

Possibly consumed expired milk 

& food just doesn't have taste which sucks the fun out of eating all together.

Bottom line, although it's come across some foul foul odors in its time, I need and love my nose! 

Yakity yak

Talk back! I talk so much more to baby 2 than I did with baby 1. first time around I felt so awkward talking to my baby and flat out didn't know what to say. I tried because I heard it was good for them but  just struggled ever being comfortable with it. Now I talk to her like a normal person no problem(she's almost two but been communicating verbally for a while now) But now that I have baby boy Ive been talking to him non stop. I have no shame in my baby talk with him. He lights up and smile and giggles and it's worth every goo ga that comes out my mouth. 

Hours of Operation

Naptime & after their bedtime but before mine. Mornings? Yah right

Real TAlk TV

The reason I love shows like Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy and even reality tv like The Bachelor, is because they keep me from gossiping about real people. I'd even go as far as to say I'm a better person when I have shows I keep up with. TMZ and Inside Edition type shows fall in the category as well because celebrities are fair game to talk about with other people and not be petty just because they're famous. Otherwise thy wouldn't be celebs if no one talked about them right? 

I'd say gossiping is one of weaknesses. I always want to know who's doing what where when why and how. Just to know. And it's terrible. It's consuming and potentially destructive. That is why I'm better off talking about fake people and fake stories because then there is no possibility of anyone getting hurt. 

My phone makes me a sucky mom

It's true. My kids, yes both of them, are totally aware when I'm splitting my attention between them and my phone. I have so much information at my fingertips to aid my parenting by answering my questions, diagnosing illnesses, connecting with other moms and giving me great ideas of fun things I do and make, yet I AM A BETTER MOM WITHOUT ALL THAT. 

One reason I bring my phone everywhere is to take pictures. Family history right? Well my pictures go to Instagram which I use for documentation/scrapbooking, and then after I post I can't help but keep checking to see who saw and comments on it! And it doesn't help that I link my Instagram to fb, that's double the likes and comments I like checking. Because its fun to see who sees how awesome your kids are and how happy you are. Ha! you feel me? But it's also a big distraction and doesn't really matter in the end! 

I'd like I implement tech ciestas in our household. Everything off at least once a day. 

Kids know, and they act accordingly. 

We wonder why when kids have all the toys in the room, they drop everything and go straight for our cells phones... Well because WE LOVe oUr TOys! They see it glued to our hands and face and pick up its value to us. Monkey see monkey do! 

I told myself I wanted to disconnect. And I feel hypocritical as I sit here and blog (at least I waited till both babies were sleeping) but I feel like my mind can rest easier if I let it play out here. I love technology, but everything has a time and place. 

So here's to recommitting to reconnecting with the present. Being with those physically with you, sharing air and space. Being present. Not looking back because you're not going that way. (That's a whole other post for another nap time) and paying something we can all afford...ATTENTION! 

Oo oos

 Can I just say breast feeding makes me feel superhuman. The woman's body is amazing and I wish our society would grow up and let the children eat in public!! It's about as natural as food sources get.  This post amuses me about 58 uses of breast milk

And I don't see why people are grossed out about consuming or using it as an adult and yet don't think drinking animal  hormones from a cows boob is weird. Ya'll got it twisted. 

Oo oos ( Roxi's attempt to pronounce "suesues") 

Ah Sugar

 If you live in a place like hawaii you know the value of hair removal. Found this recipe on Pinterest and was crazy enough to try it. 

Sugaring 

2cups white sugar

1/4 cup lemon juice

1/4 cup water

Combine all ingredients and bring to a SLOW boil. Simmer till a brown sugary color (aprox 20 min) DON'T rush it or it won't set right and either harden too quickly or just stick to your skin. 

(I usually half the recipe, but after its cooked you can store what you don't use and save it for next time)

How to do the dang thang

After its cooled, should be a putty/paste consistency. Clean area you want to remove hair from, and dry completely. Use a little baby powder if you want.  Apply sugar AGAiNST hair growth, rub a few times to make sure it grabs the hair and then rip WITH the direction of hair growth. (Waxing is the opposite) then roll up and reapply till hair is bye bye! 

Here's one of a few videos I watched to learn the technique http://youtu.be/6PUcoTG_Mqw

Bottom line:

-Hella cheap (I've saved hundreds already I kid you not)

-Easy to clean up (esp if you get it stuck, which I've done before) just use soap and water. 

-Smooth results  (last up to two weeks)

I'm so confident and stoked off this I will share with you that I successfully did my own bikini wax okayyyy. What other convincing do you need! 

Flip Flop

So I posted before I had baby boy about how our world was going to be flipped upside down again upon his arrival... that was an UNDERSTATEMENT.  When I describe to people my feelings the past almost 4 months. I can see a Postpartum Depression diagnosis about to be slapped across my forehead. I am not depressed. I feel actually quite the opposite, I feel hopeful and empowered and in love but... I hate people and the world.

I don't want my cellphone (but I do because I want to take pictures of my babies, and well then they end up on instagram of course)
I don't want to check my voicemails
I don't want to read my emails
I don't want to call anyone
I don't want to make plans
I don't want any commitments
I don't want any added responsibilities
I don't want to waste my time and emotion worrying how people feel, or what people think of me
I don't want to apologize for any of these feelings
I don't want to explain or justify my feelings to anyone
I don't want to do anything I don't want to do


I want to create my family, MY WORLD. All I want to do are the things that make me happy. Which lately revolve around my FAMILY. I want to interact with my husband and babes. I want to cut out what really doesn't matter. SIMPLIFY. I want to cut off the world. disconnect. I want to use my time wisely because it goes SO FAST. I will respond to the outside on my own time, when I want. I want to learn. PROGRESS. I want to eat good food. NURTURE those I love.

This may sound selfish or crazy, but I'm CRAZY GOOD. I highly recommend it.

Blocked

I hate how I never post because when I get to the actual writing part I way over think it. I have some epic post in my head that just never make it to the web. I've read too many other blogs that are so well written, I have to stop letting that discourage my own flow! So now that the disclaimer is out now I may proceed to out pour my deepest thoughts and desires!

feb 4 Monday late night/feb 5 Tuesday early morning : des had a dream in which his arm free fell on me. Don't know if that had anything to do with the following events but it just might have been the kick in the rumpus Baby needed.
Feb 5 3:30 am: water broke in bed. No question.
3:45 am: left for hospital
3:46 am : return to apartment because we forgot Roxi's bag, and des's wallet but were locked out. In the moment des breaks our window and lets himself in.
3:55 am: drop Roxi off with her aunty Jamie in hauula. She willingly goes to Jamie and waves "BYE MOMMY!" Which eased one of many worries I had about this day.
4:25 am: arrive at castle birth center in Kailua. Usually it takes an hour to get there... I walk in with a soaked towel, amniotic fluid dripping down my legs STILL and squeaking slippahs. Sick. Contractions are 3 minutes apart
4:30-8am: checked into my room. Mom in law arrives for support, des goes to jack in the box. Vitals, paperwork and get to walking. Walked the halls a little bit, pushed des in the wheel chair, came back to the room bounced on the yoga ball. Check vitals and baby, baby seemed to be stressed from my position on the ball so I got in the bed. My contractions were building and getting stronger as nature intends. Not gonna lie, I thought about an epidural but didn't want to prolong labor so tossed that idea quick. Contractions become back to back with no real rests dilated to an 8 and felt like pushing, so I changed positions for 2 contractions and felt urge again. Got the green light to push. Pushed an pushed but nada. Baby's heart rate was dropping. Dr said I had one more try to get him out and then they would have to use the vacuum. That sacred me straight. I said a prayer for the strength to do it. Everyone was yelling at me to go go go! PUSH PUSH PUSH!!! I honestly didnt think I could do it but out came the head. Then Just as I'm about to eject the rest of the kid they yell "STO STOP STOP!" Then there is rushing and I'm kinda like wth is going on down there! Turns out the cord was around the baby's neck tight... Purple/blue face status. Dr Moore had to quick snip the cord and then it was "GOGO GO PUSH PUSH PUSH!" the fire downstairs was extinguished as baby boy crossed the finish line. Good morning baby boy!
8:01 am: they placed him on my chest still pretty purple and he squirmed and I was just still in shock. Shaking.

That was HARD! Way different than with Roxi. Intense and not rhythmaic like my first. I was stressed out. They quick grabbed him and then I heard that cry and could breath a little easier. Everyone could.

The nurse Jill (who helped deliver Roxi too) didn't think baby was that big, till he hit the scale. 8lb 2oz. Go me. No rips either. Woohoo. Welcome Kairo Raven Fa'atamalii Enesa

It gets way too easy to justify things in life when you feel as if you are in early labor. Or if your wife thinks shes in labor. For example: eating out, watching too much tv, not getting dressed, being grumpy, co sleeping and neglecting responsibilities in general. Well it's been two weeks that I've been ready to go at any minute and it's getting old.

Just about every night after Roxi drifts off to dreamland, I can finally relax and well... Contract. I get so confused because "they say" you need to relax to let your body to into labor. But at the same time how many times do you hear pregnant women say "you're going to put me into labor!" in a stressed situation? Well for me, I will have contractions all night. Get up, walk around, go to the bathroom, clean something, pack some more stuff, maybe even shower... Go back to bed, wake up, move to the couch contemplate calling my mom to book her flight, and then lo and behold as sun is coming up, so is Roxi. ERrrrrrrk! Just like that, contractions stop. She's a powerful lady.

She's keen and she senses what's going to happen. She trying to get ALL the one on one time possible. She's also become very vocal recently. Here's some of her new vocabulary:
Unkol- uncle
Emma- her cousin Emma
Aila- cousin kaila
Leah- cousin eleah
Coo coos- cookies
Cacas- crackers
Ickin- chicken (or any meat really)
Ri- rice
Out
Bubbles- very clear
Gahma- grandma
Andy- candy

And much more gibberish I'm still in the process of translating

As you can see she all about family and food!

Pics below: trying to get in all the final single child snuggles she can get.

Last belly documentation at 38 weeks

And my baby shower! The amazing Brittany Lowry strikes again (she did my maternity photos as seen in a previous post). I was doubtful that I'd even make it to my shower without a baby, but Brittany prayed REAL hard I wouldn't have my baby before then, and that it wouldn't rain. We had been on flash flood alert the prior two days. But we made it, and had a a grand ol time!

I started this post before I had baby, but just now finished... Birthday day coming soon!!

Mama Shots

I love having talented friends! This post I will brag about the amazing Brittany Lowry who moved in a building over last September. Her husband is in school (like mine) so we get to play with her and her cute cute cute 10 month old boy Ben all day. Roxi LOVES him and is not afraid to display her affection. Ben is a trooper for putting up with all the hugs/tackles, kisses/slobber and just all around smothering. Brittany is a woman of many talents, and today I will highlight one of them by showing you the pictures she took for my maternity shoot. She has a website and you should check her out. I'll even make it easy for you, here's the link: www.brittanylowry.com I had a hard time picking just a few because I liked each one for a different reason! I was 35 weeks, and we had both the kids with us the whole time... talk about multitasking. Without further adieu: 

Pretending to model is fun. It's always interesting to try and pose with something like a belly that you bang into things and spill on all the time because you're just not used to having it be there. so PROPS to Brit for making it all look so lovely and natural despite my awkwardness. Each day we are getting closer to closing this fat chapter of life again...I can feel it. Literally.

Table for 4

It hit me this week that I'm getting dangerously close to not being able to fake dinners or any meal anymore. I won't be able to bow out with my bowl of cereal and make my husband fend for himself. I'll have KIDS to feed! Does this mean I should get a kitchen table?

Sure having your first kid is a MAJOR change to your life and a much bigger commitment than a marriage in my opinion, but it's not that hard to a) get a babysitter for one baby, which I feel like I should be doing way more often, but there are a few rare things I'd rather do alone. or b) bring baby along, which can work but takes more planning than grabbing your keys and wallet and jamming. But accommodating TWO little people seems much more daunting! Double car seats, double stroller, double diapers and wipes(for now), double snacks/drinks and double toys. not to mention the double time you spend packing it all up and unpacking at the end... Double the beings to please! We are going to be a family of FOUR.

That's no joke. That's a family unit! Some people stop after two and are completely fulfilled (some after one or even none) (Not sure what our lucky number will be but the significant other has decided there needs to be a break before 3 comes along, and he's not even the one carrying the kid, or both kids at the same time!) But we will have hit America's average of number of children! Any more and people will say things like "are those ALL yours??" "Or wow you've been busy" if they don't already make comments like that when you're huffing and puffin to lug a tantruming toddler on top of your beach ball belly up the stairs for a nap.

Glad we thought this all the way through right?! HA

Our days are numbered before our baby boy flips our world upside down. I love and hate the anticipation. One thing I know is bringing a baby into the world is the closest I've felt to God and really understood my own divine nature. There was no let down after 9 months of building and YES I can't wait to do the dang thang again!

Recapturing 2012

I'll let the pictures tell our 2012 glories

Starting with the most recent

The places we went...

The things we learned...

How to heal with essential oils

The people we loved and will continue to...

some of what we did create...

The food we ate...

Our new looks...

And in between, all that... the naps we took

What a wonderful year it was!